Down and Out in a Nairobi Stripper Dive

Mercury is twenty, she has no parents or family to speak of and one son, Kieran, who lives in a supervised children’s home.

Mercury is petite, has big brown eyes, a short spiky weave and when she talks to you, looks earnestly into your eyes. For a girl of her age, Mercury exudes a sense of confidence although she can, at a moment’s notice, drop the act and become as sweet and demure as the situation demands.

Mercury earns about 5000 shillings a day. She is a stripper at the infamous Liddos, Nairobi’s premiere destination for nocturnal debauchery and bootylicious gazing.

I met Mercury on one of those nights out, that are better left forgotten. It was late and my wits were obviously not as sharp as they should have been, because any respectable lass like me should not, in any state, allow herself to be convinced to visit one such establishment.

Vague memories of walking up a blue neon-lit staircase into the belly of the Liddos beast still haunt me… I remember stumbling into the low-ceilinged room, to a dimly-lit corner and flopping down on one of the faux-leather sofas, hoping that no one would pay any attention to me. To begin with that’s how it was: my raucous friends were having far too much fun with the “entertainment”, deflecting any curious glances away from me.

When Mercury walked over and sat down, I was busy trying to avert my eyes from the hardcore porn playing on the screen on the opposite wall. At that precise moment, I was busy wondering if the porn didn’t distract the clients from the meat market that surrounded us. Judging by the number of lap dances going on around me, I was being naive.

Wearing what appeared to be a racy blue French maid uniform with a frilly pink trim, Mercury’s outfit was almost modest compared to what the other girls weren’t wearing. Thongs the size of dental floss and frilly bras that revealed all and held nothing, was more or less the dress code of the night.

Maybe Mercury just wanted an excuse to sit down a bit and rest her weary feet, maybe she thought I had a big tip hidden away in my jeans… whatever the case, within a few minutes we were chatting away like BFFs, oblivious to our surroundings.

I couldn’t help to be curious about what Mercury was like, it felt nice to see her as a normal person and not some wild exotic creature that only exists within the realm of the pole and the raunchy table dance.

Mercury recently moved to Liddo’s from La Bovana across the street. “I worked at La Bovana for three months” she said. “La Bovana was nice, but there were never any customers, you could spend the whole night without seeing any action. I moved because Liddo’s pays more per night, but at least at La Bovana they provided water and the bathroom was nicer.”

“I want to be a good mother,” she continued looking at me a sadly. “I visit Kieran all the time, buy him clothes and toys. I didn’t have a mother or father to love me, so I want him to know he has a someone who cares”

The conversation was beginning to make me feel depressed, so I decided to move back to the more spicy details of her job. Having always been curious about the rules of a strip club, I decided to get her to break it down for me.

“There’s the main bar, the VIP and the private rooms,” explained Mercury. “In the main bar, you’re not supposed to strip off.”

I looked around curiously. Everywhere I turned, the little clothes the girls were wearing appeared to be falling off like snowflakes.

“In the VIP room, you give lap dances and strip off” she continued. “They pay KES 700 to enter and KES 500 for the lap dance. If they want more than that, then they go for the private room.”

Mercury had a lot more to say on love, working conditions, hardships and the improvements she wished to achieve. Eventually I started to drift off and decided that the conversation was best left for another day. I got up, gave Mercury a tip for having given me so much of her time and asked her for her number… judging by the physical appearance of the chicks around me, I decided that one of these days I might be able to get some interesting fitness tips off her!

 

By Ondi Madete