Top 10 Things That Women Need But Don’t Buy

You cannot live without your needs. To attempt to do this is to set yourself up for a very smudged life and yet the Kenyan woman is constantly doing; neglecting to buy things that she needs. Here is a list of some of those forgotten items.

1. Condoms and lube

The average urban female is sexually active. She is also aware of the need for protection, in addition to acknowledging that this is the age of casual sex. If you are going to out for the night and can see yourself spending the night with a random person the expected thing is that you get a pack of condoms. Unfortunately, the average Nairobi woman cannot be bothered.

2. A Tool box

Handymen need their source of income. They need that fee you pay them so they can sort their bills but having said that, there are some repair works that do not need a handy man to fix. In the case that a pipe leaks in the night, are you going to let your house flood when owning a simple tool box would have sorted you out?

3. Sex Toys

In line with the modern woman kind of thinking that you do not need a man to survive, it would mean women would not get as much sex as they want. However, there is always an alternative and in this case, sex toys are a guaranteed cure for the thirst. But how many Nairobi women do you know that actually own one? (alternatively, get phallic shaped vegetables.)

4. Thumb/Hard Drives

Are you tired of people walking around borrowing external hard drives, power-banks, USB cables and what not? we are too. Sadly, majority of this ‘borrowers’ are women and yet these electronic paraphernalia costs a fraction of what they spend on cosmetics.

5. Quality lipstick/lip balm

We are tired of bumping into women in cracked painted lips that look like they are an informertial on the shortcomings of using cheap paint brands. Now should you be one of these women, please invest in a good brand of lipstick. Alternatively, especially for those that would not want to spend the crazy amount of money necessary to acquire the high-end quality lipstick, here is a thought- lipbalm never hurt anyone.

6. Large t-shirts and hoodies

Dear Nairobi women, by the look of social media posts, your boyfriends and ex boyfriends miss their tshirts and hoodies. Yes, yes, we know they told you that you looked sexy in the oversize clothing with nothing beneath but you know what? You will look just as sexy when you buy your own. So please go out and buy your own oversize t-shirt and hoodie.

7. Pepper Spray.

Nairobi women have been victims sexual harassment, quite sadly. However, do you know what no one likes, not even big mean violators? It is pepper in the eyes. So dear Nairobi woman, remember that ‘security starts with you’ and order yourself a can of pepper spray. It might not help eradicate all cases of sexual violence but at least the number will reduce.

8. Batteries

Remember we mentioned sex toys? Well, thing is some of those need batteries, as does your remote. So buy back up batteries, and while at it get extra light bulbs and learn how to change bulbs.

9. Fitting Bras

So here is the thing, it is ugly when you are wearing a bra and half of your breasts are spilling out. Fitting bras are the obvious solution to this eyesore. So dear Nairobi woman, please have your breast size measured (They do that at Woolworth) and remember your size for the next time you go bra shopping.

 

10. Drinks

It is okay to go out and have a good time. now, for most people, having a good time entails consumption of liquor. Should you feel the need to have a good time, by drowning your blood in alcohol first make sure you can buy your own liquor.