I was inspired to write a book on mothers and daughters by my own intense relationship with my mother—a strong Eastern-European lady who survived the Warsaw uprising in Poland during the Second World War. She is a very kind and generous woman, but also very controlling. I am 49 years old, married with three children, but I still feel the need to seek her approval!

To help me understand and deal better with my mother, I was curious to find out how other women coped with this complex, sometimes destructive, but usually rewarding relationship. My research for this work in progress developed through a website (www.mummydear.com) where I invite women to tell their stories. It has resulted in over 300 submissions from 19 countries, including the U.S., Canada and Australia. Thus far, Mummy Dear makes for fascinating reading and absorbing insight into other women’s mother/daughter bonds.

Various themes have emerged while editing the book, which I will be addressing in separate chapters. For instance, as the “Controlling Mother”, Daisy, a 35-year-old from Damascus in the States wrote: “My mother undermines me and tries to control through guilt and manipulation. If it wasn’t for five years of therapy, I would be ‘divorced’.”

And the “Demanding Mother”: “We have never lived up to her expectations. Whatever we give her, she always wants more,” responds Sally, a 49- year-old English communications consultant living in Bulgaria. Or the Mummy Dear website questionnaire offers up the purely bizarre as Nicky, a British lady living in France, submitted: “My mother spent my childhood telling me that she would exit this life as soon as she felt I was old enough to look after myself. When I was 18, my mother killed herself.”

However, it is cheering to note that many of the responses were very positive and there will, of course, be a chapter on “Celebrating Mother”. The following poem sent in by a 21-year-old student from England beautifully illustrates this theme: “I’d give this world if I could say, I’m going to see my mum today; to hear her voice, to see her smile; to sit and talk with her awhile. The hardest thing in life to bare; is to want your mum and she’s not there.”